I am NOT HAPPY. Ok, I am very happy that Daddy is home. And I am very happy that it's not hot anymore so that I don't have to stay under the porch to stay cool when Mommy & Daddy are gone. And I am VERY happy that my people kids are here! I have been sleeping in the big people kid's bed. Mommy says that after the holiday where they put up the sparkly tree and have pretty boxes that I cannot sniff, my big people kid will be staying here a lot!! And that makes me happy.
But last night the worst thing happened. And that STUPID cat is off bragging to her friend Monkey about it. That stupid cat was on MY big people kid's bed and my big people kid wanted ME up there. Well, I used to get spanked if I got too close to that stupid cat so I stay away from her when I can. How about I was trying to get on the bed without getting too close to that stupid cat and she started to hiss and swat at me!!!! And I couldn't do anything about it because Mommy was in the room and she would've spanked me if I'd done anything to that stupid cat.
So I finally get on the bed and the dumb cat keeps coming! And I just snuggle down next to my big people kid and the stupid cat thinks that I am scared or something. Like I'd be scared of a stupid cat. I just don't want Mommy to be mad at me or I'd eat the stupid cat.
Anyway, now Ink is off bragging to her dumb cat friends that she scared me. Stupid cat. I wish that Mommy would let me outside when Ink is outside. I'd show her what's what. Mommy says that is why she doesn't let me outside with Ink. She doesn't want Ink to know what's what but I think that she needs a good whoopin'. From me.
Stupid cat.
But last night the worst thing happened. And that STUPID cat is off bragging to her friend Monkey about it. That stupid cat was on MY big people kid's bed and my big people kid wanted ME up there. Well, I used to get spanked if I got too close to that stupid cat so I stay away from her when I can. How about I was trying to get on the bed without getting too close to that stupid cat and she started to hiss and swat at me!!!! And I couldn't do anything about it because Mommy was in the room and she would've spanked me if I'd done anything to that stupid cat.
So I finally get on the bed and the dumb cat keeps coming! And I just snuggle down next to my big people kid and the stupid cat thinks that I am scared or something. Like I'd be scared of a stupid cat. I just don't want Mommy to be mad at me or I'd eat the stupid cat.
Anyway, now Ink is off bragging to her dumb cat friends that she scared me. Stupid cat. I wish that Mommy would let me outside when Ink is outside. I'd show her what's what. Mommy says that is why she doesn't let me outside with Ink. She doesn't want Ink to know what's what but I think that she needs a good whoopin'. From me.
Stupid cat.
posted by Sable, Molly, and Ink at
6:14 AM
8 Comments:
When we go visit Nana's house in NJ we have to put up with an annoying evil cat named Buffy. Buffy attacks all of us. He makes really cool sounds, I will admit, and his hair stands straight out, and he looks funny.
But Mommy won't let me touch him either. AND she makes ME walk away if he makes too many of those cool sounds. Why? He's talking to me. I'm listening. Isn't that polite? But Mommy still makes me walk away.
Anyway, I once "accidentally" hit the stupid cat with my tail. He "accidentally" flew into the wall from the force. He stopped bothering me as much after that.
But it was an ACCIDENT, so Mommy didn't yell at me.
You just have to make sure it looks like an ACCIDENT.
By
Unknown, at 7:07 AM
Mickey, you are lucky. My Mommy won't let me near the stupid cat. And I don't have a tail. I have a nub. I'd have to hit her with my paws and Mommy won't let me play like that with the cat. I can only play like that with Molly.
Any other ideas?
By
Sable, Molly, and Ink, at 12:14 PM
You don't have a tail? What do you mean you DON'T HAVE A TAIL?
Well... OK... Does MOLLY have a tail? Will SHE do it?
If not... Wait until your Mommy and Daddy are asleep at night. THEN take care of her.
Stupid cats.
I'm glad I don't have one at home. It's bad enough I have to deal with one on vacation.
By
Unknown, at 1:24 PM
I've never had a tail. When I try to wag, my entire butt wiggles and everyone laughs at me.
And Molly? She won't do anything that would even risk Mommy getting mad at her. She's such a Momma's Girl it isn't even funny.
And y'all must not have as comfy of a bed as I do. Once I go to sleep with my big people kid, I am out for the night. I only get up so that Mommy will give me my breakfast.
By
Sable, Molly, and Ink, at 2:00 PM
No tail? NO TAIL? That's... hmm... I don't know what I think about that.
I KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN ABOUT THOSE MOMMA'S GIRLS. That's Lily. She's such a goody-two-shoes. Never gets in trouble. Me? All. The. Time. Whatever. It's not like Mommy stays mad. So I have more fun, eat more good stuff (Mommy left fresh rolls on the counter yesterday. They were GOOD.), and deal with being yelled at.
I don't sleep on the bed with Mommy and Lily. Actually, I don't even sleep in the same part of the house. Lily snores too loudly. I go up there and wake Mommy up when I want breakfast, but otherwise? I sleep on the couch when Mommy isn't looking or on my people-bed in the basement.
By
Unknown, at 6:00 PM
Your Mommy doesn't let you sleep on the couch???? That's my bed when my people kid isn't here. I don't like sleeping in her bed when she's not here.
Your Mommy is MEAN.
And Molly is such a wuss. She has to be in the same room as Mommy. She'd rather sleep on the "dog beds" in Mommy's bedroom than sleep in the big people kid's bed. How stupid is that?
I'm surrounded by idiots.
By
Sable, Molly, and Ink, at 6:13 PM
Cats are not stupid! Dogs are stupid!
Cats are very smart and they type on the internet and they make plans to do stuff to stupid dogs.
Cats do not slobber. Stupid dogs slobber all the time.
Ink, you can come live with me and we will run off that bothersome Shadow.
By
Monkey, at 1:25 PM
Dog ARE Stupid. Neener
By
Anonymous, at 12:13 PM
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